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03/26/2006: "and as a matter of fact, i've given nothing up"

beautiful day today in Houston; lovely cool weather, sunny and breezy. we had dinner last night with K-Dub so we fomented plans to hit the Houston Zoo today. one of his ex-Texans buds and family came too. all in all it was pretty fun. great to watch kids under the age of 3 experience things like the zoo. it is all so new and exciting to them...pretty hard as an adult not to wish to feel that way again.



~~~~

i have been pretty melancholy for the last couple of weeks, and i mean that in the "pensive reflection or contemplation" sense, although it does sometimes feel like depression too. i know what's up with my head, but it doesn't make it any different knowing the circumstances and score. just life. i guess i mention it in passing b/c you (the reader) should take my entries for the last week or so (and maybe some of the upcoming ones) with that grain of salt.

was good to have dinner with K-Dub, Marissa and Makai last night. always interesting to see K-Dub's public persona and then later hear from my wife Marissa's side of things - we are all in the same boat, kids, despite salary levels & walks of fame. K-Dub and i spent some time having a beer and smoking some fine cigars i had previously gifted him (very tasty CAO Criollos....yum!) shot the shit and as my football coach from high school used to say, "i had all the answers, but none of the fucking questions."

i have been playing some select levels and types of poker, but to be honest, i am just not interested in posting anything about it. continuing in honesty, i am just not real interested in posting much ado about anything. i have an internal posting system going and sorting through it is enough work these days. at some point i will clear my head.....

i do have to set an appointment with a doctor this week. time to get the usual check-up so i can get my prozac refilled for the year. i am also going to beg, plead, and grovel for some ambien (or something similar. lunesta?) i am sleeping in 3-4 hour sessions almost every night now and it just isn't doing the trick. this is on top of having a daily working out - so i am getting plenty of exercise! the lack of restful sleep just makes me feel blasé most all the time. i am also going to request some Provigil. why? well, my hope is that is will counter-act my SSRI and allow me to set my body on a schedule: awake during the day, sleep at night. we'll see how it goes. the doc is one of our clients, so besides getting some help on the "no insurance deal" he also is a lot more trusting on our wants/needs. not like i am asking him for class four narcotics. heh.

i've been listening to a lot of nu-metal type music...not that i am into that, but i am "adult" enough now (for the next 3 min?) to not knock it. it is good to work out to and at least Chevelle isn't too annoying. i also have been playing a lot of Tool and Bill Hicks. yeah, i am sure it is warping my id, or my id is warping me. i'll post my latest workout mix here at some point. it's funny to see what i spend a couple of hours listening to. btw - Powerman 5000 is a helluva a band to work out too. that little Rob Zombie....

i would be remiss if i didn't end this post with some positive: have you tried Michelob Ultra Amber? yes, i am acutely aware of the level of piss-taste that regular ol' Ultra has. BUT, i gotta admit, this stuff is pretty drinkable. no, it doesn't replace Guinness or Shiner Bock or any of the millions of microbrews that i would normally quaff in large quantities. but it does have a "decent" taste and only racks up 3.7 grams of carbs. and anyway, i am not really "drinking" per say, since i am still supporting my wife in her on going bid against smoking. (btw - since Jan 26th!! i wish i could put into words how proud i am off her. she is a strong, strong woman.)

everyone - have a week!

Replies: 3 Comments

here's what gives me warmth....

bcd said @ 03/27/2006 01:08 AM CST

TOO CUTE!! I need one of those!

Carol Batte said @ 03/27/2006 11:58 AM CST

they grow up...but she is still the apple of our eye.

:-)

bcd said @ 03/27/2006 01:40 PM CST


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