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12/04/2007: demon tied to a chair in my brain

last Monday and Wednesday i thought i played pretty good poker; Thursday i chicken-shitted out, worrying about winning "player of the week" for the buy-in to Full Tilt's Sunday $750K Guarantee. well, i won the player of the week and then did my old song and dance. i'd curse, but i am kinda beyond it.

don't get me wrong, i hate making mistakes and i really wanted to go deep, especially since i feel like i missed some plays on Thursday due to reticence. but of course, i managed to get all my money in on Sunday on the turn, when my OESD hit gin. unfortunately, my opponents gutterball hit gin too, giving him the higher straight. small mistake, but mistake nonetheless. after dropping two-thirds of my stack there, i pushed pocket sevens on a flop with an ace; that was certainly a rookie mistake. preflop i should have shoved and hoped for the best. allowing AQ to hit on the flop was turd-tacular.

last night was the Hoy. in usual fashion, i made a major mistake. unfortunately for VinNay, i sucked out when my J-10 made two pair, cracking his kings. poor guy, his first hand at our table, he pulls kings, and i donkey him out. continuing my luckboxery, i managed to get it all in with Drizz: my aces versus his kings. thanks Full Tilt for the right side of the setup! so propelled into the top three in chips kinda early, i battled around a bit before jamming into Columbo's straight. doh! my doubling him up made him chip leader and dropped me to middle-stacked. i then bowed out when my AQ was whacked by A-10; dominated hands always flop the joint. crap.

so anyway, i am back where i started, two steps forward, one step back. i am happy with some aspects of my game, but my new mantra is "big mistakes kill!" i am having that tattooed on my hand, right next to "decisions not outcomes". anyway, i hope to start learning something...soon!

i went to lunch, shopped a little, all the while thinking about my recent play. yeah, i really do think about poker a lot. it's not overly obsessive, but it it borders on it. i am committed to improving. anyway, one thing i can console myself with is this nugget: if i am not playing in a lot of pots, moving in and out, taking shots, and yes, sometimes making mistakes, then i might be playing too tight. mistakes, even big ones, are the collateral damage of going to war at the poker table (awful metaphor, eh?) there are no pretty wars and as such, there are few pretty poker wins. you will make mistakes, some unrecoverable, but the attempt generates opportunity. so while i dislike making mistakes, i need to learn from them, but not fear them.

i caved to wifey and moved to T-Mobile. picked up a Blackberry Curve to replace my Treo 700. it is certainly thinner and so far i don't miss the Windows Media look & feel. but what fscking genius at Blackberry decided to put the media card slot under the battery? hello? ever heard of hot-swappable? fscktards. the push email is new to me and not something that is necessarily needed. i have a few accounts that get a lot of spam and if i want them checked then i get all the spam "pushed" out. much easier to check those manually and search and destroy at my leisure. but hey, not to big a deal. yet. the nifty magnet in the case is a nice touch; puts the phone to sleep when you slide it in. i like that. and should i decide, chat is built in, with ICQ, Yahoo, MSN already installed. tested out Yahoo and it works fine, but since i only use Yahoo chat for work, don't look for me to be logging in and out of that a lot. heh. voice operation is standard, but i haven't tried it, same for bluetooth. i'll get around to that sometime. desktop sync'd up with Outlook, no issues as expect. overall, i am happy with the new toy. oh yeah, the "sales rep" said 3G is coming in 2008 (something i knew, but there is no firm rollout date for say, Houston, so i wasn't counting that in my decision making process.) i was told that the Curve will be able to access 3G with a new SIM card, which T-Mobile will be providing at no cost. i'll believe that when i see it.

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